This blog is still alive, just in semi-hibernation.
When I want to write something longer than a tweet about something other than math or sci-fi, here is where I'll write it.

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Pandering? Pandering!

Friend of the Blog and Matty Boy's own CPB Padre Mickey has admitted to his audience that he is starting to have trouble coming up with his Friday regular feature, the photo funnies featuring Red Mr. Peanut Bank, Gallito Mescalito and their many action figure and statuette friends. In the words of El Padre "...as Matty Boy and anyone else who ever shared a stage with me knows, I pander to the audience."

In my best Foghorn Leghorn impression, let me say "No-ow, son, why don't you just step off to the side for second while I show you how this here panderin' thang is done."

As obsessive as I am about the actual writing of this blog, I may be even more addicted to the Sitemeter stats for this thing. I always want to see where people come from (as in Flags of Many Lands™) and what it is that brings them here. Show me a trend and, by gum, I try to exploit it!

You want a trend? I gotcher trend right here! Natascha McElhone, buddy boy! Now that's a trend!

Lotsa people come here to Lotsa 'Splainin' to see the lotsa cheekbone shamelessly flaunted by the lissome Ms. McElhone. I have posted one, count them, one picture of her in a year of blogging. As some of you might be aware, I started this blog with a picture of Indira Varma, but waited over 150 posts before I put up a second picture of her.

What are ya, Matty Boy? Re-tahded?

As usual, hypothetical question asker, I don't appreciate your attitude, but you do have a point. I now pander shamelessly to my audience and increase my Natascha McElhone output by a inflationary 200%!

Sure, she has a remarkably lovely face, but you never show a full length shot of her, Matty Boy. Why is that?

Glad you asked, hypothetical. Here you go, because I care enough... to PANDER!

While Ms. McElhone is to cheekbones what Ms. Varma is to collarbones, I want to add that Ms. McElhone has a lovely female form. Look at her arm. Does it look like she's starving herself? No, it does not. Does it look like she's in training to beat up Jet Li in an upcoming role? No, she looks neither overly muscular or starved down to famine relief levels of thinness.

She has the kind of body that red blooded American males find attractive!

(I cannot speak for my contingent of Lavender female friends, if you know what I mean, but I wouldn't be surprised if they have a soft spot for Ms. McElhone as well.)

And that, dear Padre, is how one goes about PANDERING!

7 comments:

dguzman said...

Well, actually--she's not doing that much for me.
Now that French reporter--ooh-la-la!
Signed,
One of your contingent of lavender females

FranIAm said...

You are too damn funny for your own good!

FranIAm said...

For you with love!

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Natascha,haubba hubba.

CDP said...

You're silly.

Matty Boy said...

Thank you, cdp. I've been waiting a year on this blog for someone to point that out.

johnieb said...

So, where's the French reporter? Side by side comparison is real pandering.