Saturday, May 3, 2008

Metaphor. A mighty god who smiles upon My People.

So just to be clear. Are there tall women? Of course.

Are there tall attractive women? Oh ya, you betcha.

Are there giant women? No, there are not.

Are there ways to shrink men down to the size of little scurrying creatures? Nope.

So those odd few of us who really like the idea of giant women have a fantasy that is truly fantasy, as in not gonna happen. As in you can't play quiddich and you can't have a light sabre and you can't find an outer space alien who makes bicycles fly. Some of the movies that have giant women in them are classified as science fiction, but there is no science in it. It's fantasy, pure and simple.

But we do have metaphor.

When giantesses or women pictured with tiny men appear in the media and they aren't created by My People, they invariably involve some metaphor. As we saw with earlier posts, the metaphor is often about female power or female attractiveness, but in this comic postcard from a few years back, we have an extended riff metaphor of men as hamsters. Like many comic takes on inter-gender relations, I think of these as ads for lesbianism.

All part the master plan of Those People and Their Agenda. Teletubbies are just the tip of the iceberg.

OMG! A five story giantess was strolling pleasantly through San Francisco and nobody told me? When did this happen?

Hypothetical question asker! You haven't been paying attention to the lesson, have you? You should be taking notes.

This is the actress Marley Shelton, a.k.a. Marlee Shelton, in a photo layout from In Style magazine. The photos were taken in various locations in Legoland in Southern California. The metaphor is that she's a big star and the center of attention when she wears these expensive outfits they are trying to sell. She's really cute and I liked her a lot in Planet Terror, which I reviewed last month, but most BIG stars don't appear in different films with different spellings of their names. You don't see listings for Julia Roberts reading (appeared as Julie Roberts) or for George Clooney reading (also known as George Cluny).

Just sayin'. I wish Ms. Shelton all the best and if she plays a giant woman in a film in the future, I will be first in line to get tickets to see her on the big screen.

Even though I know it's just a metaphor.


FranIAm said...

Smiling, just smiling!

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Now this is why I keep coming back here, well this and for the pictures of your family.

Matty Boy said...

You're a naughty little monkey and I'm gonna have to send a giant woman to Tennessee to 'splain things to you.

Metaphorically speaking, of course.