Friday, July 25, 2008

Mind the gap.

This post is hard for me to write, as I must delicately walk the tightrope between grumpy old manhood and dirty old manhood. Teaching at community colleges has the non monetary perk of beautiful young people in class. In fact, at community colleges, not every attractive student is in the 18 to 25 demographic, and my classes often have pretty women in their thirties and beyond.

Am I complaining? No, I am not.

But this summer in particular, I've noticed a fashion trend that I also saw to a lesser extent in the spring semester. Cleavage. Lots of cleavage. Stripper levels of cleavage. RenFaire levels of cleavage.

While I have strong evidence that my students are listening when I talk about statistics, I have no idea how many of them read this blog and expect that very few would take fashion advice from an old guy who still dresses like a grad student. But I do have three words of warning to my female students, which I have put in the form of a link.

Fred Thompson's wife.

I have nothing more to say on the topic. I feel grumpy enough and dirty enough already.


Friday means Random 10!

Just A Girl No Doubt
Substitute The Ramones
Sweet and Slow Fats Waller
Accidents Will Happen Elvis Costello & the Attractions
Gone Till November (Pop Version) Wyclef Jean
Let’s Go Get Stoned Ray Charles
Judy Hoagy Carmichael
In A Station The Band
Valse # 1, Opus 64 by Chopin (Minute) Claudio Arrau
Wagoner’s Lad Rafael Boguslav

So, Matty Boy. You complain about too much cleavage and you open the Random 10 with a song by Gwen Stefani? Mix messages much?

Hypothetical question asker, today I'm ignoring you.

Whether this is a dirty old man's Random 10 or a grumpy old man's Random 10, the only artists on this list that are much younger than I am are No Doubt and Wyclef Jean. The One True Living Elvis is a few months younger than I am, but not enough to notice. Heck, four of the songs are older than I am. Still, any list with The Ramones and Frederic Chopin is showing the ability to hit with power to all fields. The most obscure artist would be Rafael Boguslav, who recorded a great album of folk songs way back when I was still a toddler sitting on my daddy's knee.


dguzman said...

I've noticed the same cleavage trend around State College. And lots of belly too. Tube tops seem to have made a come-back while I was out buying another polo-type shirt. *shudder*

CDP said...

Well said, Perfesser.

Matty Boy said...

Yeah, dg, I noticed a few years ago a lot of young women paying full price for 80% of a blouse, with the 20% missing between the bottom of the blouse and the top of their jeans. Now it's full price for 70% of a blouse, with just as much missing on top as below.

I guess it's inflation. Or with a push up bra, over-inflation.

Anonymous said...

I think MathMan walks the same tightrope. You just don't want to notice.

Yesterday, I left the house in something that really should have been left hanging in my closet. I tugged and adjusted half the dang day until I remembered the emergency sweater in my car.

I guess sometimes fashion wisdom doesn't come with age.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

It's okay to look, it's not okay to leer. Oh who am I kidding? I leer all the time but I don't touch. Them.

ken said...

A guy I used to do the RenFaire with described it as "titties & beer".


Matty Boy said...

Picking a picture to illustrate this particular topic was every bit as hard as writing it with some small modicum of taste. I thought "Ooh, RenFaire! It's like historical and stuff!" But Ken is correct, it's an outdoor titty bar.

FranIAm said...

I love it when you talk cleavage. You do recall I had that whole early hairdresser mixup thing going on with you back in the pre-our blog PSP commenting days.

You are just a renaissance man... You love art, esthetics, Sondheim.

And cleavage.

This is why we loves ya Matty.

Distributorcap said...

if loving cleavage makes one a DOM, i hope this country has a lot of soap

Anonymous said...

Thanks for keeping us abreast of the situation. I don't get that, wanting to leave nothing to the imagination, while wearing outfits that scream, "Look at me, I am my boobs!"

But... I'm happy for them. It means more strippers can afford to go to college, in an environment they are acclimatizing for more openness towards public breast feeding. They are doing the good work.

Matty Boy said...

I don't assume they actually are strippers, just that some of them dress like strippers. There's no question that they get attention and they don't see it as negative attention.

And I also want to be clear that some very attractive women in class dress much more modestly that what I have described.

God bless them and keep them. And if the young ladies could keep them under a little more fabric, I wouldn't complain.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I don't assume they are strippers either, though it was more fun to imagine I did when I typed my comment. I'm sure their manner of dress has more to do with the heat of summer and the appeal of attention. Heck, if I were in their shoes I'd use my budding knowledge of statistics to interpret the direct correlation between the broad spectrum of plunging necklines and number of ogle hits.