Thursday, December 11, 2008

Poor dunce.

If politics were all that mattered, if intelligence were all that mattered, if hope for justice were all that mattered, I should simply detest Joe the Plumber. But for reasons that sometimes even escape me, I kind of feel for this poor dunce, thrown into a vicious machine whose workings he did not understand in the least.

The cynics in the McCain campaign, and there were so many it's hard to say which one, threw this poor dunce into the meat grinder to protect Sarah Palin, another poor dunce who really should have had some clue as to what was in store, but was just too convinced of her own star power to realize what a small sliver of the market would love her and what a large chunk would either hate her or wish she would go away.

Joe got book offers, but poor dunce that he is, he went with a nobody vanity press that promised the book would be ready by Christmas. The book was supposed to be released by December 1, and then was postponed to December 10. It's December 11, and Amazon still says the book has yet to be released. Joe's website says you have to order it through his website to have it by Christmas. If it doesn't work out, Joe, and people scream and sue and want their money back, just a friendly piece of advice. You could explain to folks that there are officially twelve days of Christmas, so there is no official breach of promise until January 6.

I got your back, buddy, even if I do think you are too stupid to keep your legs moving.

I stole the title "poor dunce" from a lyric by David Bowie from his 1995 album Outside. This album reconnected him with two great artists he collaborated with in the 1970s, the master producer Brian Eno and the mad piano genius Mike Garson. The brilliant work of both can be heard on this song A Small Plot of Land.

I should also admit that I thought of Joe the Plumber and David Bowie in the same context because of an October post by Padre Mickey, who is a gigantic musical influence in my life to this day.


FranIAm said...

This kind of reminds me of when you call a plumber and then they make you wait a long time before they actually show up at your house.

CDP said...

Ha ha to Fran! I feel the same way about this poor chump; my pity far outweighs my contempt.

dguzman said...

As if he represents all Americans. Stupid asshole.

Matty Boy said...

I call him a dunce but don't back it up. The slogan on his website is "It's We the People, not We the government."

So this guy memorized the first three words to the Preable to the Constitution, completely forgetting that the single sentence is about the people working to make a better government.

This is the stupid that has been bred by the people who made Ronald Reagan into a saint.

Undersquid said...

I never became interested in anything Joe the Plumber had to say, and I have even less interest in anything that has been ghostwritten for him.

That whole meat-grinding process he entered was bizarre, as was every mention of him by McCain as though it was supposed to signify anything politically meaningful to me, or anyone I know.

Distributorcap said...

maybe they can sell his book him in Tandem with Mooselini's --- and a triumvirate with My Pet Goat