Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Nerdiness meets mathiness meets an icon of My People.

Some nerdy British types have made a t-shirt filled with silhouettes of movie monsters to show the relative sizes, from smallest to largest lined up from left to right, starting with the evil doll Chucky and finishing with the monster from Cloverfield. (Click here to read how much I hated Cloverfield and in the comments, you'll see how many of my readers were glad for the warning.)

The shirt is available through this website, with prices quoted in pounds.

I bring this up because in the middle of the list of monsters, marked in a red rectangle is the Fifty Foot Woman, showing her to be much taller than the robots from Transformers, as well as towering over both a T-Rex and the original King Kong, but considerably shorter than Mr. Stay-Puft from Ghostbusters and Godzilla, which here is given the correct Japanese spelling Gojira, a lovely nerdy touch.

These numbers would be completely correct if the Fifty Foot Woman were in fact fifty feet tall. In the original movie, that might have been a good estimate of her size, but then there is the famous poster, the image that is used in the silhouette on the t-shirt. Just how tall is she here?

If we compare her height to the car in her hand, fifty feet might be a reasonable estimate, but the artist couldn't leave well enough alone and decided to have her straddle a six lane freeway, complete with railing and a center divider.

Let's start with how far apart her feet should be in the position. Measure out four feet. If you stand with your feet about forty eight inches apart, this is the semi-comfortable distance for straddling. Five feet apart is very hard and if your heels are six feet apart, you are doing the splits.

So what would measure four feet to us is six lanes of freeway to her. A slim freeway lane is about eighteen feet across and a generous one is twenty. This means the distance across is at least one hundred feet and more likely about one hundred twenty. Doing some simple ratios, this means the woman in the picture is at least one hundred twenty feet tall and more likely over one hundred fifty feet, which would put her eye to eye with Godzilla. Also, the car in her hand is like a Sherman tank in comparison to the cars on the freeway below her, and the fact that it is closer to us is not enough to make up for this size difference.

I put this up because it has been more than two months since I have written an actual honest to Lenny giant woman post, and I know from my Sitemeter stats that My People stop by regularly, hoping that I will throw them a bone.

Have faith, My Brothers and Sisters! I have not abandoned you!


trinket999 said...

Yes we do stop by regularly. And thanks for the morning pick-me-up.

Margaret Benbow said...

Matty Boy, maybe somewhere out there is a gigantic 50-foot-woman (or bigger!) who has a secret fetish for 5'9" earth men. I hope you find her.

dguzman said...

Leave it to you to math-out on the poster. Nice work!

Eric Johnson said...

Best way to deal with the Cloverfield monster...

Sic a giantess superheroine on the ugly beast!


namastenancy said...

I second dguzman's hope for you - She must be out there! Maybe an ad on Craig's list?